Post by Whiteheart on Nov 28, 2008 15:04:13 GMT -5
WARNING: Contains minor spoilers for Eclipse. If you haven't read it, then don't read.
DISLCLAIMER: I do not own Warriors, Kingdom Hearts Final Fantasy, or anything else mentioned in here.
“101 Ways to Annoy Blackstar”
1. Run around ShadowClan camp screaming, “BLACKSTAR, HE ALWAYS GETS ANGRY THE MORE YOU ANNOY HIM THE MEANER HE GETS. SOMETIMES I THINK I SHOULD CUDDLE HIM SOMETHING TELLS ME NOT YET, NOT YET…”
2. Wrap him up in duct tape.
3. When he tells you to get it off, peel it off with a spatula. Very quickly.
4. Call him “Whitestar,” insisting that he’s not really black and that it’s false advertising.
5. Drop-kick him out a window.
6. Sing “They’re coming to take me away, ha haa!” whenever he’s around.
7. Set him on a blind date with a hungry wolf.
8. Shake a can of soda and then open it in his face.
9. “Accidentally” kick him inside a microwave and put in on ‘high’ for three minutes.
10. Poke him for 24 straight hours, and we he asks you to stop, gasp and say, “It’s alive!”
11. Tell him that Sandstorm was in love him.
12. Tell him that Leopardstar was in love with him.
13. Put him a straight jacket.
14. Stick his paw in warm water while he’s sleeping.
15. Then blame it on Firestar.
16. “Accidentally” slip raccoon poisoning into his meal.
17. Stick a metal pole up his butt.
18. Prank call him at two in the morning.
19. When he says that his refrigerator isn’t running, tell him that it’s walking away and he should go catch it.
20. While he’s gone, make Russetfur leader of ShadowClan.
21. Then, when he comes back, say that there’s no more room in the elder’s den, so he’s been moved to “crazy ex-leader’s den”.
22. Sign him up for therapy.
23. Ask him if his mother was colorblind.
24. “Accidentally” stick him in with the red wash.
25. Then, call him “Pinkstar” for the rest of his lives.
26. Dress him up like Hannah Montana for Halloween: wig and all.
27. Then refer to him as “Popstar” for the remainder of the day.
28. Tell him where babies come from while he’s eating.
29. Glue the entrance to the dirtplace shut.
30. When he has to go, stand out sit of it, saying, “Drip…drip…drip…”
31. Ask him to come on a golfing trip with you in the middle of a thunderstorm.
32. Then, give him a metal golf club and have him stick it straight up.
33. Here a classic: while he’s sleeping, stick shaving cream in his paw and then tickle his nose.
34. Shine two flashlights in his eyes at two on the morning, and scream, “WATCH OUT FOR THE MONSTER!”
35. Mail him to Fenway wearing all Yankees clothing.
36. Or, mail him to Yankee Stadium wearing all Red Sox clothing.
37. Lock him in a locker and leave him there for a month.
38. Make him watch Dora the Explorer.
39. Show embarrassing pictures of him to Firestar.
40. Better yet, show them to Tigerstar.
41. Hack into his MySpace and write and entire section dedicated to how much he loves Hannah Montana.
42. Hack into his Facebook and post pictures of him and his blankie all over the place.
43. When he asks who did it, blame Russetfur.
44. Pour cold water on him.
45. Or, pour cold water on Tigerstar and blame it on him.
46. Tie him to an anvil and push him out of a plane. Without a parachute.
47. Have him hug a Heartless. (Kingdom Heats)
48. Declare that ShadowClan’s entrance to Gatherings would now be announced by playing “Everybody Makes Mistakes” by Hannah Montana.
49. Tape a sign on his back that says “kick me” before the next Gathering.
50. Short-sheet his moss nest.
51. Just when he’s almost finish working on an ultra-important, fifty page report, give him so coffee. When he’s drinking it, tell him that you have pictures of Tigerstar wearing a bikini. Cue spit take.
52. Then, give Tigerstar the pictures of him wearing a bikini and tell them that you got them from Blackstar.
53. Give him a bath.
54. In ketchup.
55. Braid his fur with pink ribbons.
56. Sign him up for “Crazy Cats Anonymous.”
57. Steal Zeus’s Master Bolt and blame it on him.
58. Pour glitter all over him and tell him that he’s Edward Cullen.
59. Then, mail him to the craziest Twilight fangirl you can think of.
60. Cover him in postage stamps and then peel them off.
61. With a spatula.
62. Throw rocks at him all day.
63. When he asks you to stop, start throwing boulders.
64. When he asks you to scratch his back, do it with a cactus.
65. Glue antlers to his head and mail him to the North Pole.
66. Tell him that you want to reenact “Grand Theft Auto” and steal his car.
67. Then, proceed to run him over.
68. Tell him that you thought he would feel left out so you bought him an E-Z Bake Oven.
69. When he tries to get up in the morning, nail his tail to the nest.
70. Better yet, nail his tail to the ground so all he can do is run around in circles.
71. Use him as a tetherball.
72. Mail him to a dog show.
73. Send him a card saying, “To my favorite psychopath.”
74. Give him a wedgie.
75. Nuggie him at random moments.
76. Cuddle him whenever he’s trying to address the Clan.
77. Stick a band-aid on his fur and then peel it off.
78. Quickly.
79. Push him off the top of the Empire State Building.
80. Hide his blankie.
81. Set him on a blind date with Tawnypelt.
82. Ask him for muffins. (Inside joke between my friends and I)
83. When he tries to address the Clan, run up behind him shout, “I’D LIKE TO DEDICATE THIS SONG IN MEMORY OF ASHFUR!”
84. Then, proceed to break out into song.
85. Dunk his head in a barrel of water.
86. Better yet, a barrel of water filled with leeches.
87. Ask him to play water polo.
88. If his says no, drag him anyways.
89. Play ‘pin the tail on the Blackstar’.
90. Give him a bath in gasoline, and then light a match.
91. Tell him that you want to reenact the ballroom dance scene from FFVIII and dance with him.
92. Paint his nose red and call him “Rudolph the Red Nosed Clan Leader”.
93. Make him listen to Christmas music in the middle of July.
94. When he asks you to pour him some water, pour it all over him, saying “you didn’t specify where you wanted me to pour it.”
95. Pour thumbtacks all over his nest.
96. Wrap him Christmas lights, and then turn it on.
97. When he goes to make dirt, give him poison ivy for toilet paper.
98. Whack him with a frying pan for no reason.
99. Video tape him singing to Michael Jackson’s early hits and put it on YouTube.
100. Push him off a cliff, and say, “Ding Dong, the psycho’s gone.”
101. Introduce him to Sephiroth.
DISLCLAIMER: I do not own Warriors, Kingdom Hearts Final Fantasy, or anything else mentioned in here.
“101 Ways to Annoy Blackstar”
1. Run around ShadowClan camp screaming, “BLACKSTAR, HE ALWAYS GETS ANGRY THE MORE YOU ANNOY HIM THE MEANER HE GETS. SOMETIMES I THINK I SHOULD CUDDLE HIM SOMETHING TELLS ME NOT YET, NOT YET…”
2. Wrap him up in duct tape.
3. When he tells you to get it off, peel it off with a spatula. Very quickly.
4. Call him “Whitestar,” insisting that he’s not really black and that it’s false advertising.
5. Drop-kick him out a window.
6. Sing “They’re coming to take me away, ha haa!” whenever he’s around.
7. Set him on a blind date with a hungry wolf.
8. Shake a can of soda and then open it in his face.
9. “Accidentally” kick him inside a microwave and put in on ‘high’ for three minutes.
10. Poke him for 24 straight hours, and we he asks you to stop, gasp and say, “It’s alive!”
11. Tell him that Sandstorm was in love him.
12. Tell him that Leopardstar was in love with him.
13. Put him a straight jacket.
14. Stick his paw in warm water while he’s sleeping.
15. Then blame it on Firestar.
16. “Accidentally” slip raccoon poisoning into his meal.
17. Stick a metal pole up his butt.
18. Prank call him at two in the morning.
19. When he says that his refrigerator isn’t running, tell him that it’s walking away and he should go catch it.
20. While he’s gone, make Russetfur leader of ShadowClan.
21. Then, when he comes back, say that there’s no more room in the elder’s den, so he’s been moved to “crazy ex-leader’s den”.
22. Sign him up for therapy.
23. Ask him if his mother was colorblind.
24. “Accidentally” stick him in with the red wash.
25. Then, call him “Pinkstar” for the rest of his lives.
26. Dress him up like Hannah Montana for Halloween: wig and all.
27. Then refer to him as “Popstar” for the remainder of the day.
28. Tell him where babies come from while he’s eating.
29. Glue the entrance to the dirtplace shut.
30. When he has to go, stand out sit of it, saying, “Drip…drip…drip…”
31. Ask him to come on a golfing trip with you in the middle of a thunderstorm.
32. Then, give him a metal golf club and have him stick it straight up.
33. Here a classic: while he’s sleeping, stick shaving cream in his paw and then tickle his nose.
34. Shine two flashlights in his eyes at two on the morning, and scream, “WATCH OUT FOR THE MONSTER!”
35. Mail him to Fenway wearing all Yankees clothing.
36. Or, mail him to Yankee Stadium wearing all Red Sox clothing.
37. Lock him in a locker and leave him there for a month.
38. Make him watch Dora the Explorer.
39. Show embarrassing pictures of him to Firestar.
40. Better yet, show them to Tigerstar.
41. Hack into his MySpace and write and entire section dedicated to how much he loves Hannah Montana.
42. Hack into his Facebook and post pictures of him and his blankie all over the place.
43. When he asks who did it, blame Russetfur.
44. Pour cold water on him.
45. Or, pour cold water on Tigerstar and blame it on him.
46. Tie him to an anvil and push him out of a plane. Without a parachute.
47. Have him hug a Heartless. (Kingdom Heats)
48. Declare that ShadowClan’s entrance to Gatherings would now be announced by playing “Everybody Makes Mistakes” by Hannah Montana.
49. Tape a sign on his back that says “kick me” before the next Gathering.
50. Short-sheet his moss nest.
51. Just when he’s almost finish working on an ultra-important, fifty page report, give him so coffee. When he’s drinking it, tell him that you have pictures of Tigerstar wearing a bikini. Cue spit take.
52. Then, give Tigerstar the pictures of him wearing a bikini and tell them that you got them from Blackstar.
53. Give him a bath.
54. In ketchup.
55. Braid his fur with pink ribbons.
56. Sign him up for “Crazy Cats Anonymous.”
57. Steal Zeus’s Master Bolt and blame it on him.
58. Pour glitter all over him and tell him that he’s Edward Cullen.
59. Then, mail him to the craziest Twilight fangirl you can think of.
60. Cover him in postage stamps and then peel them off.
61. With a spatula.
62. Throw rocks at him all day.
63. When he asks you to stop, start throwing boulders.
64. When he asks you to scratch his back, do it with a cactus.
65. Glue antlers to his head and mail him to the North Pole.
66. Tell him that you want to reenact “Grand Theft Auto” and steal his car.
67. Then, proceed to run him over.
68. Tell him that you thought he would feel left out so you bought him an E-Z Bake Oven.
69. When he tries to get up in the morning, nail his tail to the nest.
70. Better yet, nail his tail to the ground so all he can do is run around in circles.
71. Use him as a tetherball.
72. Mail him to a dog show.
73. Send him a card saying, “To my favorite psychopath.”
74. Give him a wedgie.
75. Nuggie him at random moments.
76. Cuddle him whenever he’s trying to address the Clan.
77. Stick a band-aid on his fur and then peel it off.
78. Quickly.
79. Push him off the top of the Empire State Building.
80. Hide his blankie.
81. Set him on a blind date with Tawnypelt.
82. Ask him for muffins. (Inside joke between my friends and I)
83. When he tries to address the Clan, run up behind him shout, “I’D LIKE TO DEDICATE THIS SONG IN MEMORY OF ASHFUR!”
84. Then, proceed to break out into song.
85. Dunk his head in a barrel of water.
86. Better yet, a barrel of water filled with leeches.
87. Ask him to play water polo.
88. If his says no, drag him anyways.
89. Play ‘pin the tail on the Blackstar’.
90. Give him a bath in gasoline, and then light a match.
91. Tell him that you want to reenact the ballroom dance scene from FFVIII and dance with him.
92. Paint his nose red and call him “Rudolph the Red Nosed Clan Leader”.
93. Make him listen to Christmas music in the middle of July.
94. When he asks you to pour him some water, pour it all over him, saying “you didn’t specify where you wanted me to pour it.”
95. Pour thumbtacks all over his nest.
96. Wrap him Christmas lights, and then turn it on.
97. When he goes to make dirt, give him poison ivy for toilet paper.
98. Whack him with a frying pan for no reason.
99. Video tape him singing to Michael Jackson’s early hits and put it on YouTube.
100. Push him off a cliff, and say, “Ding Dong, the psycho’s gone.”
101. Introduce him to Sephiroth.
< what do you think he's freaking out about?